I do

Well wrestle me naked on a faux polar bear rug in front of an roaring open log fire and call me Alan, if it hasn't turned into The Blessed Friday once more. But enough about my personal plans for celebrating my Anniversary with the now infamous Lady T, there's celebrations to be had.

Firstly I would like to apologise for my abundance of tardiness this morning, call me Tardy Tidy if you like, but when I have a day off I like to slowly ease myself into it, like a swimming pool that is just a few degrees cooler than you expected. Of course there is the argument that it's probably better to leap from the side of the pool, adopt the bomb position and plunge straight in. But to be honest with you, I like to approach my far and few days away from the office in a more relaxed manner.

Yes, today's pre-scheduled break in normal work based tomfoolery is all in aid of celebrating the fact that the, let's face it, frankly Amazing Lady T has managed, through unimaginable patience, unprecedented understanding, and unsurpassed tolerance to of been married to me for seventeen years come tomorrow. Yes I know that some of you will be saying, if she'd only just murdered me on our honeymoon, she would of saved herself years of rolling her eyes, months of shaking her her head in despair, and weeks of coping with unpleasant sudden noisy odours, and she could of been out and free on good behavior years ago! Yet despite this truth, she has chosen to remain at my side for all these years. Worthy, some would say of at least making it onto the New Years Honours list at some point, or at the very least some kind of medal of momentousness.

So it is with a full thankful heart of love and pride (No don't play that song!) that I thank the gracious and gorgeous Lady T for all her sufferings over the 17 years we have been a team. For without her by my side I certainly wouldn't be the personification of pleasantness and harmonious facetiousness that you see before you today. (What!? Why are you laughing!? How rude!)

So if you have one to hand, or if you don't maybe later, do raise a glass to the wondrous Lady Tidy whom I still totally adore and is literally 'my other half' as I only really feel complete with her by my side.

Here is our song.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3ze5boOcxLM&feature=kp