Friday 11 April 2014

I feel crappy . . .

Look I know it's Friday and everything, and that really should be a good thing in my book, (and actually Friday is mentioned as being a good thing in my actual book, so that's alright!) but I am suffering with a HUGE dose of horrible Man Flu at the moment, and I feel dreadful. Which is kind of the last thing I need at the moment. In fact, I feel crappy . . .

It might seem crazy what I’m about to say
No sunshine here, I need to take a break
My hot water bottle's filled, I'm feeling spaced
Trouble gettin' air, like if you care, baby by the way

[Chorus:]
Uh, Because I’m crappy
Moan along if you feel in a gloom without any oomph
Because I’m crappy
Moan along if you feel like crappiness is the proof
Because I’m crappy
Moan along if you know that crappiness feels like poo
Because I’m crappy
Cough along if you feel like that’s what you wanna do

[Verse 2:]
I've got bad news talking colds and that, (yeah)
Someone gave me what I got, and I can't give it back, (yeah)
Well, I should probably warn you I’m not feelin' fine, (yeah)
No offense to you, but I'm a waste of time
Here’s why

[Chorus:]
Because I’m crappy
Moan along if you feel in a gloom without any oomph
Because I’m crappy
Moan along if you feel like crappiness is the proof
Because I’m crappy
Moan along if you know that crappiness feels like poo
Because I’m crappy
Cough along if you feel like that’s what you wanna do
Hey, come on

[Bridge:]
(Crappy) I feel down
Can't nothing (Crappy)
Stop this frown
My temp is too high (Crappy)
To bring it down
Can't nothing (Crappy) cool me down
I said (Crappy Crappy)
Bring it down
Can't nothing (Crappy Crappy Crappy) bring it down
My temp is too high
Bring it down
Can't nothing (Crappy Crappy Crappy) bring it down
I said

[Chorus:]
Because I’m crappy
Moan along if you feel in a gloom without any oomph
Because I’m crappy
Moan along if you feel like crappiness is the proof
Because I’m crappy
Moan along if you know that crappiness feels like poo
Because I’m crappy
Cough along if you feel like that’s what you wanna do

Because I’m crappy
Moan along if you feel in a gloom without any oomph
Because I’m crappy
Moan along if you feel like crappiness is the proof
Because I’m crappy
Moan along if you know that crappiness feels like poo
Because I’m crappy
Cough along if you feel like that’s what you wanna do

(crappy crappy crappy)
I feel so down… can’t nothing…
Stop this frown… my temp is too high…
Bring it down… can’t nothing…
Bring it down, I said

Because I’m crappy
Moan along if you feel in a gloom without any oomph
Because I’m crappy
Moan along if you feel like crappiness is the proof
Because I’m crappy
Moan along if you know that crappiness feels like poo
Because I’m crappy
Groan along if you feel like that’s what you wanna do

Because I’m crappy
Moan along if you feel in a gloom without any oomph
Because I’m crappy
Moan along if you feel like crappiness is the proof
Because I’m crappy
Moan along if you know that crappiness feels like poo
Because I’m crappy
Sneeze along if you feel like that’s what you wanna do

Thursday 10 April 2014

Lean on me . . .

There was a small commotion at Tidy Towers last night. A baby black bird had fallen from it tree and was sat in one of the flower beds shouting as best it could to be rescued. Whilst quite an old baby it obviously didn’t quite yet have it’s flying feathers ready and seemed totally helpless as it sat squawking next to the greenery with it’s squat little body and tiny fuzz adorned head. So first things first we tried to make sure the cats were indoors, as they are not know for their sympathy towards abandoned flappy, fluffy things. So once the two terrors were incarcerated I went out to try and catch the hapless thing and move it to a safer spot.

After initially panicking as I loomed over it and scampering further down the flower bed I did manage to gently cup my hand around it’s fragile little body and pick it up. Amazingly it stopped shrieking at this point and just gazed up at me without even struggling. (It must of thought I was it’s daddy, I was wearing all black at the time which must of helped.) We had decided that probably the best place for it was in our neighbours back garden across the street, as for some reason our cats don’t seem to frequent their property very often.  As I carried it through their back gate and into their garden it looked up at me again seemingly totally at ease being in my warm hand and just opened it’s huge gaping orange  mouth, as if to say “You’re looking after me now – feed me! I is hungry!” Now, regurgitating grubs and worms, is sadly not in my skill set, so I carefully placed the baby bird in the flower bed and found a small slug which, after a struggle to pick the darn thing up, I dropped into it’s awaiting open mouth. Then as I stood back up, proud to of helped this fragile creature, even if only in a small way, it made clumsy sprint across the lawn and ran face first into the guinea pig enclosure. Where it decided to sit down again and have a shout.

Still I do remember thinking how totally helpless it was, and how dependent it was on me, if only for a few minutes, to look after it. Which got me thinking, we’re all dependent on other people really. Perhaps not to same degree as a small black bird with a fuzzy head, but we all have people in our lives who are our rocks, and whom we cling to when we’re feeling helpless.

In order to live any kind of existence, there are certain requirements – that is, ‘needs’ – that have to be fulfilled in order to do so.  Food, clothing, shelter, air, water are necessary for all humans to survive. As tiny children, we can’t obtain these things ourselves, so we are dependent on someone to provide them.  We need to depend on someone who has the knowledge of what kind of food we should eat, where and how to get heat when it’s cold, where and how to find fresh clean water.  Not only do we need someone who has this knowledge, but someone who also has the ability to get these things for us.

Hopefully our caretakers are wise enough to not only provide these things for us, but to teach us how to get these things for ourselves.  Over time we move from almost complete dependence on someone else, to independence.  We learn how to drive, how to shop for food, how to earn our money so we can become self-reliant.

Our society embraces independence as the ‘ultimate’.  But even when we sit on the sofa, that we bought with our own money, in our own house that WE pay for, reading the internet powered by electricity that we pay for, some of us come to realise that we’re not as independent of others as we want to believe.

We DO depend on others.  If we want a certain kind of lifestyle, we need others to a greater degree than we think.  Someone else built the sofa we’re sitting on. You might be able to build one yourself, but it would probably be rubbish. If you don’t want to built it yourself, you would have to rely on either someone else making you one or giving you a sofa! Or you’d have to rely on someone else to pay you money for a skill that you DO have or a product that you made, so you can then use the money to buy a sofa. You’d also probably have to rely on someone else to sell you that sofa, even when you do have the money.  Of course, you can always try to steal a sofa but that ain’t easy to do on your own either!

The point is, that we DO need others, and it’s ok to need other, more than that, it’s essential to the way we lead our lives to be dependent on others, it’s one of the reasons why human beings are such a successful species. We all go from dependence to independence, and from independence to inter-dependence.

Inter-dependence as more like teamwork. A football team rely on each other to assist in moving the ball down the field towards the goal. It would be difficult to try and move that ball down the field by yourself, unless you were Michael Owen in 1998 and you were playing Argentina. So yes, although you might succeed once in a while, it’s so much easier if you have team mates who are on your side.

Some situations require independence.  Others require interdependence, and still others require dependence.  Some people may be financially independent, yet emotionally dependent.  Others are emotionally independent, but financially dependent.

Can we depend on others TOO MUCH?  Absolutely.  Can we be TOO independent?  Most definitely. So when is it TOO MUCH?  It’s hard to tell to be honest. Someone may look at a situation and consider you to be ‘too dependent’ on someone, and think of it as a bad thing, while others may see your dependence as a necessary thing in whatever the situation may be.

It probably becomes “too much” when you’re not being proactive about whatever the situation is. As I know only too well at the moment let me tell you. And if anyone suffers from D.P.D (Dependent Personality Disorder) it’s certainly me! I am certainly clinging onto good Lady T for all I’m emotionally worth at the moment.

Marriage of course, or long term relationships, are very much a team sport, so to speak. Think of yourself as joining a football team. You agree to take part in the practice matches several times a week, to wear the team colours, and to play in all the games. You are voluntarily agreeing to give up a lot of your independence in order to be part of that team, and you're agreeing to play by the rules of the game.

Even if you’re not married, we all rely on someone to lean on when we’re feeling unable to cope with life. That may be a parent or a best friend or a brother or sister, but we all have that rock we cling to when the world seems like a storm ridden sea. It’s okay to dependent on people when we’re feeling incapable of dealing with what the world is throwing at us. Just make sure that you’re ready and able to return the favour should someone cling onto you.

Do look after yourselves, and each other.